These scriptures were told over and over to me growing up.
If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles.
Matthew 5:41
..If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.
Matthew 5:39
Its important to remember that Jesus was speaking to an oppressed people under Roman domination. The scriptures above deal with how they should interact with their oppressors. The Jews were a proud people. They felt good about their heritage. They were looking for the Messiah to redeem their people from their earthly oppression. These verses were meant to show a sense of humility and love for one’s enemies.
However too many times those with low self esteem tend to take the above verses to an extreme. You can only go the extra mile so many times and turn your cheek so many times before you break down emotionally.
Above all else is the 2nd greatest command:
‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
Matthew 22:39
The requirement for loving your neighbor is to love yourself. How can one love their neighbor if they do not love themselves? Having a good image of oneself is in God’s plan.
Too many times I have bent over backwards to please others in order to feel better about myself. The mistake that I was making was that I was trying to be a people pleaser. I felt that I had to be perfect in order for others to like me. Subconsciously others saw this and took full advantage of my willingness to help. I was used. Many times people waited until the last minute to give me things or to plan activities. And I gleefully accepted in order to win their friendship.
God doesn’t want this. God wants me to feel good about myself because I am a unique individual created in the image of God, not because of what I do for others. I should want to do good because of God’s grace, not because I feel like I have something to prove. I shouldn’t feel obligated to help someone just because they request it. The best word for me right now is “no.”