Top 50 Things Admissions Never Told You About College

Ok. I pulled this off another site. I think its one of those lame email forwards. Anyways I’m going to list it and then comment on it if I have something to say.
1. Every clock on campus shows a different time.
2. Two meals per day is the standard.
3. Road trip whenever possible.
4. Going to the mailbox was never an ego booster/breaker before.
Never got any mail. Except for that junk mail.
5. You will begin to nap again.
Napping started back my freshmen year. Always took an afternoon nap after classes were over.
6. Your bookstore bill will almost equal your tuition bill.
Argh! Barnes and Nobles.
7. Squirt guns = stress relief (and “Assassins” if you’re in SPB).
8. Instant Messenger becomes an addiction.
Never had Instant Messenger in college.
9. E-mail becomes your second language.
I discovered email in college. It was big then. Probably bigger to me back then.
10. College students throw paper airplanes, too.
11. You never realized that so many people were smarter than you.
Yep. Many more people smarter than me at college. Or at least they could sound like they were really smart in the classroom discussions.
12. College football is the coolest thing on the planet.
Lipscomb never had a football team. It still isn’t cool.
13. Western Europe could be wiped out by a plague and you wouldn’t know it, but you can recite last week’s rerun of “The Simpsons” verbatim.
News lost its coolness in college. We never watched it.
14. Cartoons are for all ages — especially “Scooby Doo”.
I don’t know about that. But the return of the Dukes of Hazzard was the event in my dorm at college.
15. Disney movies are more than just classic.
But I don’t watch Disney movies. And they weren’t big at Lipscomb.
16. You will never rent more movies in your life.
I never rent movies anymore. Never.
17. No one is too old for video games.
During my freshmen year someone got a hold of an old Space Invaders game. Cabinet version. We held a tournament with a Papa John’s Pizza as the prize.
18. Procrastination is an art form.
19. Snood is more addicting than cigarettes.
Never used either. I don’t even know what Snood is…
20. It never hurt so much to get sick.
Thankfully I was never sick in college.
21. Care packages are right up there with birthdays.
Never got a care package. Thanks, guys.
22. The health center nurses are only there because they couldn’t make it at a real hospital.
23. Campus is only clean for Freshman Orientation and Family Weekend.
24. Nothing you want to register for will be open.
Nothing ever was open. Except during my Senior year.
25. Classes — the later the better.
Actually I enjoyed having early classes. Got them over faster for an afternoon of sleeping.
26. You are no longer thankful that the fire alarms are here to protect you.
Hated midnight fire alarms. Hated them.
27. Jeans may be worn as many times as the wearer desires.
28. The only time you dress up is when your jeans are dirty.
29. Showers become less important; sleep becomes more important.
I showered everyday thankyouverymuch.
30. Asleep by 2:30 a.m. is an early night.
Asleep by 2:30a.m. is a late night. I was always asleep by 1AM.
31. Creativity in the dining hall is key.
32. The “Freshman 15” is not a myth.
Actually I think I lost 15 pounds my freshmen year. Maybe 5 lbs.
33. If it’s snowing out, the only reason you will leave your room is for food (or in Lipscomb’s case, class).
34. Dishes smell after days of piling up.
Never had dishes.
35. Cereal makes a good meal at any time of the day.
Sometimes I ate lucky charms because the meals at Lipscomb’s dining hall were unacceptable.
36. You will eat anywhere that has a buffet.
37. You will eat anything that is free.
There was a time when they offered free pizza in the student’s center for watching the Florida-UT game. I got my free slice(s) and left. Got alot of mean looks.
38. New additions to the food groups: ramen and pizza.
39. You will get to know the pizza man by name.
I must have had pizza at least 2 times a week. Maybe more.
40. Stealing from the dining hall will become second nature.
People stole the lunch trays to go sledding on.
41. ATMs are the Devil’s Advocate — ATM = “Another Twenty Missing”
Never used an ATM in college. Parents were nearby.
42. Duct tape heals all wounds.
Huh?
43. Keys have never been so important, but you still manage to lose them or lock yourself out of your room frequently.
I was locked out of my room maybe once.
44. If they say you can’t have it in the dorm, they’re just kidding.
45. You will come to hate hallways/elevators with a passion.
A friend of mine got stuck in the dorm elevator once. One hour in there.
46. Those ugly cinder blocks are not soundproof.
47. Pictures, posters, e-mails, or anything else to cover the ugly cell we live in will become wallpaper.
I hung pizza boxes on the walls. Those personal pan pizza boxes.
48. Everyone is only nice for the first week. After that, no matter how nice you are, some people won’t smile back. Get used to it.
It’s so true.
49. You are never alone.
50. College is the ideal lifestyle except for all those pesky classes.